Celebrating the culture of scared white people.

You want to know what's wrong with the Detroit Downriver area? It's stuck half-way between country and city -- geographically and socially. Sandwiched between farmer-friendly Monroe and not-as-blighted-as-you-think-it-is Detroit, the communities that call themselves "Downriver" have halted the development from country to city at an annoying and awkward stage. They've got all the drawbacks of city life (like traffic, pollution, crack houses) and none of the benefits (like good museums, workable mass transit, or cultural diversity).

The lack of interesting cultural festivals is a prime example. Go to a real city, and you'll find events as diverse as Dia de los Muertos, Chinese New Year, Juneteeth, or even Diwali. Come to the Downriver, and you get... the Trenton Scarecrow Festival. That's right, the best we can do for cultural event is a sanitized suburban-friendly version of Halloween crossed with a tacky art fair. Diversity? Heck, they had a whole hour of jazz-rock on Saturday.

Welcome to Downriver, where a "cultural experience" is a German-American having a Polish sausage for lunch.

Posted at 11:39:34 PM EDT on 13 October 2003 from Trenton, MI