Michael Bauser Is Losing His Mind
I have trouble remembering people's birthdays. (In fact, I usually forget about my birthday until the day before.) For remembering friends' birthdays, I'm completely useless. For relatives' birthdays, I at least manage to remember which annual events occur nearby on the calendar, so I can remember to buy a card. My youngest brother's birthday is somewhere near Memorial Day. My father's birthday is around tax day. My mother's birthday? Close to the autumnal equinox. That's the best I can do.
So, after carefully examining the position of the sun in the sky today, I realized I needed a card for Mom, and headed to the nearest drug store (part of the chain I used to work for, actually) for a four-dollar birthday card. It was a completely uneventful trip, until I tried to pay for the card. The cashier acted embarassed to be there, and asked if I remembered her. As it turns out, she mistook me for some guy she met at a bachelorette party last week. Once we established that she hadn't met me Friday night, she declined to elaborate on the embarassing encounter with my doppleganger.
I just hope I wasn't the stripper, `cuz I'm not worth paying to see shirtless.
Posted at 11:29:22 PM EDT on 22 September 2004 from Trenton, MI